The Ten Commandments of People Pleasing

Harriet Braker , Ph.d wrote a book in 2001 about women's need to please entitled The Disease to Please. In her book she explained the Ten Commandments of People Pleasing.
1. I should always do what others want, expect, or need from me.
2. I should take care of everyone around me whether they ask for help or not.
3. I should always listen to everyone's problems and try my best to solve them.
4. I should always be nice and never hurt anyone's feelings.
5. I should always put other people first, before me.
6. I should never say "no" to anyone or let others down in any way.
7. I should never disappoint anyone or let others down in any way.
8. I should always be happy and upbeat and never show any negative
feelings to others.
9. I should always try to please other people and make them happy.
10. I should try to never to burden others with my own needs or problems.

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be suffering from an inability to set appropriate boundaries. Whenever I read these ten commandments, the real impossibility of people pleasing become clear. No one could realistically live this way.

These commandments leave no room for the woman herself. It requires a woman to have no needs or desires of her own which is not humanly possible. Despite this impossibility, many women strive to achieve this impossible task of pleasing everyone around her while taking nothing for herself. There has to be a balance to pleasing others as well as meeting your own needs.